Amy and Dale Jr finally had their daughter, 9 months of everyone guessing what the name would be is thankfully over. Naturally, they didn’t pick any iteration of Dale or Ralph. Mainly because they are sane individuals who aren’t crazy people.
NASCAR fans aren’t known for being the most mentally stable individuals in the country. Like college football, super fans who tweet at 17 year-olds NASCAR fans have turned their attention to a day old child. Mentions and comments ran rampant on social media. “Congratulations” was misspelled 100+ times, people commented on NASCAR’s post about it as if they were personally speaking to Dale and Amy. It’s a great day to feel better about your own sanity.
Here are some of the best/cringiest comments;
Nathaniel, she’s a day old just chill out man. This kid just learned how to breathe on her own and Nate dawg wants to toss her in a stock car and make her Danica Patrick. Maybe we let her walk first, she’s not a giraffe it’s going to take years.
Nothing worse than the “me, me, me” crowd of the mentally unstable online. THIS ISN’T ABOUT YOU, Laurie. Congrats on the sex and having Chuck put you in pain but no one cares he was born on Dale Sr’s birthday. It’s just a date on the calendar, he’s not Santa Claus we’re not jotting that down in the book of remembrance.
More of this “me, me, me” stuff with Sandra. Everyone just wants to relate to a story or someone famous. Oh, you have someone named Isla in your family? I have a Ron in mine so does that mean I should tweet at Ron Swanson? Absolutely not, reel it in Sandy.
Possibly the cringiest post of the year. Amy refers to herself as a unicorn then describes a unicorn by giving the definition that is not in Merriam-Webster. NO ONE CARES YOU’RE A KYLE BUSCH FAN. THIS ISN’T ABOUT YOU.
Hello there *Canadian accent* Linda. Here she is telling everyone it’s her birthday. Congrats, Linda. Hit up the local Chili’s establishment tonight for the free birthday dessert.
Mike doesn’t seem like a Dale Jr. fan. Sad the nonfans are commenting more than the real fans.
Crystal with the big head is over here indoctrinating Isla into a nation that doesn’t even exist. Congrats Isla you’re a member of Palestine now too. Both are made up countries that have no citizenship. Good luck getting into the UN with those credentials.
So we’re crediting George Strait with the line “I saw God today”? Need that quote slapped on a wall with George’s name below it and the year it was said and it better have AD after it so help me god.
IT ISN’T ABOUT YOU JEANETTE! Jesus these people and their birthdays.
As a society, we need to stop using numbers in words. NASCAR social media managers have made them a thing and these simpleton fans LOVE THEM. None of you even know what #Di9 means and you tweet that shit every week. Gre88t doesn’t even make sense Lisa. It would be pronounced gre-eighty eight -t. In only works with 8.
Jo. I’m going to have you committed for pre-crime. You shouldn’t be dreaming about a person you’ve never met having a baby. You shouldn’t dream about anyone having a baby. Jo is a pre-crime stalker and we need to locate her.
Are you looking for a revisionist history take with a dabble racism and anthem kneeling in it? Charlie Earl Stewart Jr. has you covered with this completely pointless use of Facebook’s comment feature.
You aren’t best friends with the Earnhardt’s. You’re not neighbors, you won’t see them at the Memorial Day get together. Just don’t be so creepy all the damn time. Just chill out, guys.
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